I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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