got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
