Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
