Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
