I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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