Don't you send me to vm
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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