Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
