You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
