The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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