I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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