Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
