Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
