I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
