Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
