My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
