Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
