i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize