im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
