Texts From Last Night

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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

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  (781): I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed http://tfl.nu/sznd
  Replies (127) Good night (129806) Bad night (3527)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.

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  (708): so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened. http://tfl.nu/8b76
  Replies (34) Good night (3883) Bad night (1847)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes

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  (405): i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes http://tfl.nu/6w2z
  Replies (10) Good night (5626) Bad night (1214)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.

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  (403): we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now. http://tfl.nu/goi4
  Replies (16) Good night (5887) Bad night (1113)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  You're barking up the wrong lesbian.

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  (715): You're barking up the wrong lesbian. http://tfl.nu/4ul9
  Replies (11) Good night (4453) Bad night (1276)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there

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  (319): You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there http://tfl.nu/a5ka
  Replies (14) Good night (1287) Bad night (3138)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.

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  (813): I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit. http://tfl.nu/1d92
  Replies (13) Good night (2892) Bad night (1484)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.

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  (972): By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor. http://tfl.nu/m469
  Replies (6) Good night (2643) Bad night (976)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me

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  (+44): Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me http://tfl.nu/dbfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1167) Bad night (4295)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?

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  (703): Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible? http://tfl.nu/w9is
  Replies (12) Good night (862) Bad night (2660)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.

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  (570): kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted. http://tfl.nu/t3jd
  Replies (2) Good night (1169) Bad night (506)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick

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  (804): You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick http://tfl.nu/kw0t
  Replies (1) Good night (524) Bad night (1215)
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  (805): View more from California

  My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.

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  (805): My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit. http://tfl.nu/alyo
  Replies (9) Good night (1979) Bad night (941)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.

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  (914): Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block. http://tfl.nu/om9a
  Replies (0) Good night (617) Bad night (396)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is

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  (856): we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is http://tfl.nu/1dmq
  Replies (3) Good night (292) Bad night (169)

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