Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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