I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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