Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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