Cold hands, warm shart.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
