I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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