hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
