I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize