It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
