I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
