Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
