just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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