Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize
