Where are you?
In a non slutty way
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Randomize
