My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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