Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I accidentally had phone sex last night
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
