Jerry, you need to find god
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Randomize