I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
