I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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