I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
