Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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