just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize