maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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