Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize
