: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
