everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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