just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
