Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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