I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize