ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
