He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
