yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
